Go with the Flowbee by Phil
I mentioned last month that my mom had her knee replaced. She is doing great and becoming more mobile each day. There was one unforeseen side effect of her surgery, and in true Phil fashion, I turned it into a mini-adventure. Read on...
Since my teens, I've only had one barber - my mom. She does a good job of keeping me trimmed and presentable, and yes, (for you inquisitive folks out there) this is my real hair and no, I don't color it. God may not have blessed me with good sense, but He did provide good hair! Anyhow, after her surgery, my mom was not able to stand long enough to give me a haircut. What to do? Find another barber? Go to a salon? Nope. This was the perfect opportunity to fulfill one of my lifelong dreams - to own a Flowbee!
I'm amazed at how many people have never heard of the Flowbee. I remember watching the amazing as-seen-on-TV infomercials back in the 80s and knowing this was the perfect "guy" device. Invented by a San Diego carpenter (manly profession), it is basically a mini hedge trimmer you attach to your vacuum to cut your own hair. And of course, the more suction the better, so they even include an adapter for your shop vac! (Come on men, that's cool!) I just know the original was held together with a lot of duct tape. I ordered mine directly from the factory in Kerrville, Texas. How's that for manly! (Actually, the thought that most guys from Texas wear hats and you can't see their haircut didn't occur to me until right now. Hmmmm...)
The happy day came when Mr. UPS dropped a shiny new cardboard box at our door. Like a kid at Christmas, I tore open the package, attached the vacuum, glanced at the directions, and with Pam looking on (with amused disbelief on her face), I flipped the switch. I wasn't sure which nozzle to use, so I picked a medium one and started bouncing it around on my head. You've probably been following me long enough to expect a horror story of disaster and mishap to follow, but the Flowbee worked great. Even Pam and my mom had to admit my new haircut looked just fine. Strike another point for manly ingenuity - haircut accomplished! (Although next time, I think I will try the shop vac just for fun.)
The Flowbee is a lot like God (I've waited so long to say that). Hebrews 4:12 tells us "the word of God is alive and active, sharper that any double-edged sword...," (like the Flowbee cutter) and Acts 2:2 describes the Holy Spirit like a "rushing mighty wind" (like my vacuum cleaner). You see, the key to the the Flowbee is the vacuum. You can pass those cutting blades over your head all day long, but until the vacuum sucks your hair into the blades, your hair remains unchanged. It takes a combination of the blades and the wind to cut off the wild, scruffy and scraggly pieces. In the same way, you can read the Bible all day long and gain only head-knowledge, but until the Holy Spirit sucks your heart, soul and mind into the double-edged sword of truth in scripture, your life will remain unchanged. Like a successful Flowbee haircut, a vibrant, growing Christian life needs both God's word of truth and the Spirit's daily leading. Just remember, "For your walk to look nice, let God suck and slice!"
I wish I could say all my previous self-hair-cutting attempts were successful, but that story will have to wait until next time.